Life is like a box of faces

"'When I die,' I said to my friend, 'I'm not going to be embalmed.

I'm going to be dipped.'

Milk chocolate or bittersweet was the immediate concern."

-- Adrianne Marcus

Self portrait 12-5-13

"What you see before you, my friend,

is the result of a lifetime of chocolate."

-- Katharine Hepburn

"Your hand and your mouth agreed many years ago that,

as far as chocolate is concerned,

there is no need to involve your brain."

-- Dave Barry

Today is my 21st wedding anniversary.

Happy Anniversary, D Ray!

I decided to buck tradition and skip the typical brass/nickel gift and go with chocolate instead.

Unlike my husband, who is consistent, rock solid and super dependable, I tend to be a little ... unpredictable.

I'm pretty sure he'd agree that being married to me for 21 years really is like a box of chocolates.

Hell, most days even I don't know what I'm gonna get.

Through a glass darkly

"Nature gives you the face you possess at twenty ...

Life the face you possess at thirty.

But the face you have at fifty is the face you deserve."

-- Karleen Koen, Through A Glass Darkly

Self portrait 12-4-13

Mr. Potato Face

"You can glorify God by peeling a potato if you peel it to perfection."

-- Rev. J.D. Liddell, Chariots of Fire

Potato face with peppercorn eyes 12-3-13

"Everything is more glamorous when you do it in bed, anyway.

Even peeling potatoes."

-- Andy Warhol, The Philosophy of Andy Warhol: 

From A to B and Back Again

"Depression is like peeling a potato with another potato.

It just doesn't work out.

And people don't get it, 

so they say: 'Why don't you just use a peeler?' 

and hand you another potato.

No one gets it."

-- Unknown

You say tomato, and I say tomahto.

You say potato, and I say how about giving it a little potato peel mustache and a chin dimple?

After Thanksgiving I didn't think I could face another potato.

Evidently I could.

Horror vacui

"For your birthday, I got you a box.

Hooray! It's empty, so you can

fill it with whatever you want."

-- Jarod Kintz, 

A Zebra is the Piano of the Animal Kingdom

Self portrait 12-2-13

"They gave Pandora a box.

Prometheus begged her not to open it.

She opened it.

Every evil to which human flesh is heir came out of it.

The last thing to come out of the box was hope. 

It flew away."

-- Kurt Vonnegut, Timequake

"The human life cycle ... evolves around the box;

from the open-topped box called a bassinet,

to the pine box we call a coffin ...

It should not surprise us then that the lowly box 

plays such a significant role in the first Christmas story.

For Christmas began in a humble, hay-filled box of splintered wood.

The Magi ... laid treasure-filled boxes at the feet of that holy child.

And in the end ... the Lord of Christmas was laid down in a box of stone.

How fitting that each Christmas season brightly wrapped boxes 

skirt the pine boughs of Christmas trees around the world."

-- Richard Paul Evans, The Christmas Box

Someone gave us a huge basket filled with many boxes of a bunch of different chocolates.

This box with the little peep-through window was full of chocolate-covered pretzels with sprinkles.

The boys ate all the pretzels.

So, the box was empty.

And you know how nature abhors a void.

(That's horror vacui to you Latin-speaking folks and Aristotelians.)

Some say that human nature abhors a void, too.

People will do lots of extreme, and dangerous, and crazy things to fill their void.

I do this. 

All work and no play makes Batgirl a dull superhero

"A little nonsense now and then,

is cherished by the wisest men."

-- Roald Dahl, Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator

Self portrait 12-1-13

"You can discover more about a person in an hour of play

than in a year of conversation."

-- Plato

"Go and play.

Run around.

Build something.

Break something.

Climb a tree.

Get dirty.

Get in some trouble.

Have some fun."

-- Brom, The Child Thief

"It is human life.

We are blown upon the world;

we float buoyantly upon the summer air a little while,

complacently showing off our grace of form and our dainty iridescent colors;

then we vanish with a little puff,

leaving nothing behind but a memory --

and sometimes not even that."

-- Mark Twain, "Mark Twain's Own Autobiography," 

North American Review, May 3, 1907

Defense mechanism

"All art is an intensely vulnerable gesture,

and it is made with no small amounts of risk, and fear.

So, I have plenty of sympathy for self-defense mechanisms,

especially among artists."

-- Steven Erikson

Self portrait in bubble wrap corset 11-30-13

"Everyone struggles to guard their heart from breaking, 

when they should desire to have a heart that breaks.

... some people won't even own a dog for fear it will die --

you can't bubble-wrap your heart ..."

-- John Geddes, A Familiar Rain

"Without comedy as a defense mechanism

I wouldn't be able to survive."

-- Gary Shandling

Pull!

"To succeed in life, you need three things:

a wishbone, a backbone and a funnybone."

-- Reba McEntire

G.I. Joes with a wishbone 11-29-13

"As my mom used to say, 

'If wishes were horses, we'd be up to our eyeballs in shit.'"

-- Cat Adams, The Eldritch Conspiracy

"If I had one wish, it would be for self-drying pants.

Wait -- no! Unlimited wishes!

How do I return these stupid  pants?!"

-- Stephen Colbert

It's the day after Thanksgiving, so.

You know.

Time to pull the furcula.

Which means ...

Ding! Ding! Ding!

It's Latin terminology time here at A Face A Day.

Furcula is a Latin term meaning "little fork," in reference to the bone in chickens and turkeys that we commonly call the "wishbone."

Which means...

Ding! Ding! Ding!

It's time for a bird anatomy bonus round!

The furcula is formed by the fusion of the two clavicles, and is supposedly there to strengthen the bird's thoracic skeleton to withstand the rigors of flight. (Even though I personally have never seen a turkey or a chicken fly.)

Which means...

Ding! Ding! Ding!

It's the pop culture daily double!

Traditionally the wishbone, once it is removed from the bird, is allowed to dry and is then held by two opposing "wishers" who each make a wish as they pull the bone apart. It is believed that the wish is granted to the puller who snaps off the larger portion of the bone.

You're both supposed to hold and pull the furcula with your pinkie finger, even though in today's face, Joe and Joe are obviously employing a whole hand technique. Hey, if you have Kung Fu grip, why not use Kung Fu grip? I mean, evolutionarily speaking, if chickens and turkey's don't fly, then they don't really need their furculas, which means that over time, furculas will fade away. Like gills and tails. Right?

So, if Joe and Joe don't use their Kung Fu grip, over time, it will fade away until, eventually, they won't be able to grasp. They'll have those dumb, stiff, unposeable hands, like Barbie. Which means they won't be pulling any more furculas.

And that just ain't gonna happen.

Not on my watch.

Around these parts, evolution is a one way street, my friends. No going back.