"Life's pretty good,
and why wouldn't it be?
I'm a pirate, after all."
-- Johnny Depp
Self portrait 7-17-13 |
“A taste for adventure is by no means a masculine monopoly.”
-- Lloyd Alexander
“I do not see, for there is no I to see.
That is what the pirates know.
There is only seeing and,
in order to go to see, one must be a pirate.”
-- Kathy Acker
"I have a pirate fetish --
I just always thought eye patches were sexy."
-- Michelle Branch
To quote myself, I said,
"I'm thinking about wearing an eye patch.
A really cool-looking, bad ass eye patch.
It could be my thing.
I could be that cool, bad ass chick with the eye patch."
Well, I went one step further and made myself a bad ass pirate eye patch.
And once I'd made the pirate eye patch, really the only logical next step was to actually dress up like a pirate and wear it for a self portrait. Besides, it was a perfect excuse to try out my tarantula neck tattoo.
Granted, I don't look much like a chick, but I still think I look pretty cool.
Pretty bad ass.
And that fluttering eye thing?
You can't even notice it behind the skull and crossbones and dozen metal spikes.
I totally love it that my kids don't even flinch when I do shit like this.
While I was finishing up this costume, my 18-year-old son, Sam, came home from his responsible, normal, grown-up, big kid job.
I should have been fixing supper, but instead I was upstairs blacking my teeth when he came into my bathroom.
He was like, "Hey, whatcha doing?"
And I was like, "Dressing up like a pirate."
And he went, "OK. Do I have time to mow a couple of lawns before supper?"
And I was like, "Sure."
I love my family.
I mean, you know, when I'm not at sea, swashbuckling and avasting ye hearties and plundering and getting booty and lots of other super-adventurous, dangerous pirate-y stuff.