Eye-eye-eye eye of the Zombie!

"It's all fun and games 'till someone loses and eye,

then it's just fun you can't see."

-- James Hetfield

Zombie self portrait 7-18-13

 "The eye altering, alters all."

-- William Blake

 

Zombie self portrait (2) 7-18-13

"I look very different on camera compared with how I do in real life.

On camera, I look my best when everything is enhanced,

especially my eyes."

-- Martine McCutcheon

Zombie self-portrait (3) 7-18-13

 "I have scary eyes ...

I remember coming home from school and asking my mum

if I could get an eye transplant, 

and of course she declined."

-- Tim Ferriss

Hoo! Oooooh!

Shadows on the mountain, and the night begins to fall;
Gather up the children, 'fore the darkness takes us all.
Tribe has come together, standin' naked against the night;
Twenty feet from the fire, the evil waits with zombie eyes.

Eye-eye-eye eye of the Zombie!
Eye-eye-eye eye of the Zombie!

-- John Fogerty,  "Eye of the Zombie"

OK, OK.

I promise.

Not every post and portrait is going to be about my stupid twitchy eye.

But it is my blog, so I'm afraid you'll have to indulge me for at least a little bit while I deal with it.

Because if you haven't already noticed by now, that's how I cope. It's how I deal with stuff. By making pictures of it.

A couple people have told me that, from the outside, my eye twitch isn't that noticeable.

I don't believe them.

Because from the inside, it feels like it's flapping and flopping all over my face like a bloody, dangling zombie eyeball. Well, maybe it's not that bad, but I'm exercising my artistic license here to make a point.

Did I mention that it's my blog?

Also, can I just say that when it's too hot to be outside, you might want to try making yourself up like a zombie!
It's a fun indoor Summertime activity the whole family can enjoy.
Although there is something even more fun about making yourself up like a zombie when the whole family is off working, or watching TV, or drinking iced tea, or whatever families do when it's too hot to be outside.
.
Because then you have a fun little zombie secret to keep in your pocket all day. 

Bone head

"It is not my intention to be fulsome,

but I confess that I covet your skull."

-- Arthur Conan Doyle, The Hound of the Baskervilles

 

Self portrait  7-15-13

“Life's true face is the skull.”

-- Nikos Kazantzakis

Self portrait (2) 7-15-13

“The trauma said, ‘Don’t write these poems.
Nobody wants to hear you cry about the grief inside your bones.”

-- Andrea Gibson, The Madness Vase

Best. Scarecrow. Ever.

“I promise not to hurt you, unless you try to take my shit. 

Then I'll twist your head off and hide it in a bush somewhere.” 

-- Cedric Nye, The Road to Hell is Paved With Zombies

Zombie scarecrow 6-23-13

“Brains, BRAINS, BRains, brains, BRAINS.
BRaiNS, brains, Brains, BRAINS, BRains, brains, BRAINS.
BRAINS, BRains, brains, BRAINS, brains.”

-- Ryan Mecum, Zombie Haiku: Good Poetry for Your ... Brains

I planted a lovely vegetable garden earlier this spring.
It is fenced in and gated to keep out the rabbits and squirrels.
And now, for extra protection, it has a zombie scarecrow as a security guard.
He is guardin' my garden.

The way I see it, scarecrows are scary enough as it is.
Zombies are even scarier.
So the one-two punch of scarecrow and zombie is a fright cocktail that should keep out anything with a brain.

My son, Leo, helped me build this scarecrow, which is standing sentinel between the yellow zucchini and the red bell peppers.
I, of course, made the face. I made it from a Styrofoam wig head, some spray paint, some polymer clay rotted teeth and raffia (for hair).
Leo provided the arrow penetrating the zombie scarecrow's heart, as well as the materials for the dangling eyeball (covered wire and a bouncy ball). He also helped me pick out the zombie scarecrow's wardrobe at the thrift store. (I particularly love the adorable little -- er, I mean super scary -- Freddy Krueger sweater.)
Leo also built the frame and distressed the clothing, and he made the hands.  

A zombie scarecrow really is the best kind of scarecrow.
Think about it.
I don't have to worry about him eating my broccoli, zucchinis, cucumbers, peppers, basil and tomatoes, because zombies don't eat vegetables.
Zombies eat brains.
And vegetable plants don't have brains.
Except cauliflower kind of looks like brains.
And I am growing three cauliflower plants.
I will keep a dangling eyeball on those.

Thank you, Mrs. Roosevelt

"What are you?" I rasped.

It smiled. 

"Whatever scares you."

                                                                                     

                                                       -- Kim Harrison, Dead Witch Walking

Magazine face with eyes and a lizard 4-15-13

 "I must not fear. 

Fear is the mind-killer. 

Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. 

I will face my fear. 

I will permit it to pass over me and through me. 

And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. 

Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. 

Only I will remain."
        

                                                                       -- Frank Herbert, Dune

  

Magazine face (2) with eyes and a lizard 4-15-13

Eleanor Roosevelt famously once said: "Do one thing every day that scares you." 

She was basically saying "face your fear," but with an important twist.

Notice that Mrs. Roosevelt didn't say, "Look at one thing that scares you." 

Because you can look all damn day at something you fear. But fear doesn't blink. It just looks back. Like those staring contests when you were a kid. Eyes wide open, watering. Waiting for the other guy to blink first. Trying like heck not to. But that's just a standoff, really, a deadlock where nobody ever emerges a clear winner. And if someone wins, who really cares? What do you get? Dry eyes, that's all.

Mrs. Roosevelt also didn't say, "Talk about one thing that scares you."
Because you can talk all damn day about what scares you. Blah, blah, blah-dee, blah. Fear just gets off on the attention.

That's why the girl in today's face is speechless. There's a void where her mouth should be. Cuz that lizard is in no mood for chit chat. And nothing she could say will make it go away anyway.
Because fear doesn't discuss.
Fear doesn't "dialogue."
Fear doesn't  give-and-take.
Fear just takes.
Fear takes a lot.
Fear takes a lot of time.
Fear takes a lot of energy.

Mrs. Roosevelt said "Do."
She said "Do one thing every day that scares you." Because doing something is powerful.
Once you look at something, it's looked at.
Once you talk about something, it's talked about.
But once you do something, it's done. 
It's done, even if the doing simply means waiting for the fear to pass -- to skitter away on it's little lizard feet and go stalk someone else.

I'm not going to list my fears here because:
A: The list is too long, and 
2: Listing them won't make my fears go away. They'll just be all like, "Hey! Check it out! We're on a list!" Like they got their damn name in the paper pr something. I don't want to give them the satisfaction.

But I will say that doing this blog every day scares me. It scares me because it bumps up so hard against so many of the fears that are on my list. 
And that's exactly why I do it.
Every day.
Because it scares me.
Every day.
This project, these faces -- this is how I "do" something about my fears.
Every day.

Thank you, Mrs. Roosevelt.

Scaredy face

“If we stay where we are, where we're stuck, where we're comfortable and safe, we die there ...

Eyes in a box 3-16-13

... We become like mushrooms, living in the dark, with poop up to our chins. 

If you want to know only what you already know, you're dying. 

You're saying: Leave me alone; I don't mind this little rathole. 

It's warm and dry. Really, it's fine.

When nothing new can get in, that's death. 

When oxygen can't find a way in, you die. 

But new is scary, and new can be disappointing, and confusing - 

we had this all figured out, and now we don't. 

New is life.” 

-- Anne Lamott, Help Thanks Wow: Three Essential Prayers