"At the end of the day it's about how much you can bear,
how much you can endure.
Being together, we harm nobody;
being apart, we extinguish ourselves."
-- Tabitha Suzuma, Forbidden
|Self portrait 7-28-13|
"Emotional unavailability means that for whatever reason,
you are choosing to honor protection of your heart instead of love...
Emotional unavailability is the layer (how you show up to other people)
that is covering the pain or fear of pain, which is covering up who you really are ...
When you are only sharing parts of yourself,
there is no way the other person can unconditionally love you,
because he or she doesn’t know you.
It is like taking someone on a tour of your home
but keeping the door closed and locked on your favorite room.
You’ll let them into the kitchen, living room, and even the bedroom,
but not into your most treasured room;
perhaps it is your shrine, perhaps it is your garden.
In any case, it is your sacred place.
The “heart of your home” is off-limits,
leaving others to feel as if they don’t really know you completely,
or feeling left out of an important part of your life.
This leads to mistrust because they don’t know for sure what you are withholding,
and they begin to feel like you are hiding something.
Indeed, you are; your most authentic self.
-- Monique Marie,
"Emotionally unavailable: What it really means and how to get on the right path"
“I’d begun to notice her less and less often,
like her colors were fading and blending in with walls.
She was shrinking.”
-- Laura Anderson Kurk, Glass Girl